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Brian Reindel 👾⚔️'s avatar

Brutal. Absolutely brutal. I love that you took on the "Level Up" challenge in such a creative fashion. Excellent job, Michael, a fantastic entry to the quest!

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jeff white's avatar

Ah. Heresy. That old thing. Really interesting take on the prompt (and the first I've seen that used the fantasy prompt). Very cool to see. Thank you!

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Nick Winney's avatar

bravo for taking on the fantasy...i was groaning when i got to the end because i wanted to know more! really! diary style is a tricky one because its the writer's conversation with himself and so exposition can come across as weird because ... why would they need to explain what they know to themselves... so i think you balanced it well there to create just enough imagery. For me it was only unsatisfying becasue I wanted to know more but i understand the premise that the heretical writings had to be stamped out which fits the hinted-at brutality and oppression and brings it to an end with a CHOP. i did also feel that the fantasy aspect was only really in the concept of their being elves and that the story could transform to sci fi almost instantly if they were refered to as some alien species. i hope you do enlarge this to a novel... you've clearly got something in mind... questions questions... what is the metal... how have the elves become enslaved... will they rise up... will their mythical saviour return... Thanks for sharing your work!

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David Perlmutter's avatar

She's in the novel "Tarzan and the Jewels of Opar", one of the later ones.

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Michael S. Atkinson's avatar

Ah; that one I haven't read.

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David Perlmutter's avatar

Is this La the same Queen of the Jungle whom Edgar Rice Burroughs wrote about in the Tarzan novels?

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Michael S. Atkinson's avatar

I only read one of them, the first one I think, but that was twenty-some years ago, and unless La was a deity who enslaved elves for mining purposes I wouldn't think so.

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