Editorial note: this was written for
‘s prompt: A Malevolent Genie.“And then…and then….and then he wished for an unending celebration! Only he dropped the R! He dropped the R!”
The crowd of genies howled in laughter, banging cups and bottles on their tables in appreciation. One of them, however, over in the corner, rolled his eyes in supreme distaste. They were all so juvenile. So uncivilized. Exploiting loopholes, playing juvenile tricks on the humans… who did they think they were, leprechauns? They had cosmic power at their fingertips, and they were using it for locker room sport. Well, if that was the way the game was played, he’d show them how to do it properly.
It happened that the next human to make a wish was Dazeem, a small-time merchant in one of the larger cities that clung to the outskirts of the sand wastes of Carcoona. Dazeem didn’t know the lore, and so he didn’t think much of the tarnished lamp he’d picked up in a savvy trade with a passing copper merchant. Naturally he noticed the faded inscription on the side, and tried to wipe the lamp to make the inscription clearer.
It amazed the genie that after all this time the man was still shocked by what followed. “What…what are you?” he gasped.
“I’m a genie, I grant wishes, what’s yours?” he said wearily. He’d go through the whole recitation only if he had to.
“Oh…” Dazeem said. Wild landscapes opened in his mind, visions of prosperity, power, everything he wanted. Unfortunately, he reverted to something a little more basic. “I want a girl!”
“Fine,” the genie said. “I know just the one.” He snapped his fingers. Dazeem promptly vanished.
Zarzinna, Queen of the Bug Lords of Zarzaron, was far evolved beyond her distant genetic relatives, the preying mantis of Earth. Nevertheless, she remained like them in one respect. Zarzinna would eat well that night.
This is wonderful 😂 genie locker room needs more air time, i tell you what!